Perfect
by SlytherinesqueBeauty
Summary: Yukena goes through a troubled childhood. But who will help her feel loved? ONE SHOT! SongFic to Perfect by P!nk. M for Language and insinuation to rape. NO INCEST!


Hey everyone, its me again! :) just a quick word about this fic. This is my first anime period. So if it absolutely blows, I'm sorry. CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is most appreciated. But if you're just going to tell me I suck, please keep it to yourself. Anyway, a few minor details I've changed, because this is FanFiction, and I can do that!

Yukena's brother is NOT Hiei, her brother was stillborn, unfortunately

My Yukena is not the Yukena in the show. Mine has attitude and is depressed.

Yukena has a Jagan Eye, just roll with it please…

Jagan Eyes can locate your Mate, and guide you toward them and you can Hear whispers of your mate and feel their emotions in times of need. ( I realize this is not so. But just please bear with me it's part of the story….)

Anyway… that its for this A/N! on to the Song Fic.

I do not own the Yu Yu Hakusho characters or anything from the series. (As much as I wish I owned Hiei ) Likewise I have no ownership rights to Perfect by Pink.

Made a wrong turn Once or twice Dug my way out Blood and fire Bad decisions That's alright  
>Welcome to my silly life Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood Miss "no way it's all good"<br>It didn't slow me down Mistaken Always second guessing Underestimated Look, I'm still around...

Yukena was always making the wrong decisions, going the wrong direction. When she was younger, her mother would always tell her that it was all her fault that her twin brother had died during labor. Yukena was constantly beaten, rejected, and generally overlooked. All she ever wanted to do was make Mommy happy. But no matter how hard she tried, she never could. Everytime she tried to make A's in class she would get F's. When she would try to make breakfast for Mommy, Mommy never liked what Yukena had made. She was always told that no matter what she tried to do for anyone it wouldn't be good enough. Yukena always messed things up. That's why Mommy says no one likes her..

_FlashBack_

_She was five years old going to the food market for Mother._ _"Ow!" she called out as she stumbled over a rock in the path. Holding in the tears, she picked herself up off the ground. She felt a stinking on her right cheek as well as on both of her knees. She looked around as the tears started spilling over the edge. During her fall, she had spilt all of the groceries on the pavement, and not one passerby stopped and offered to help, and her mother's voice came back to her. "No one wants you around here. Your worthless, you stupid girl! I wish it were you who died and your brother was the one who lived!" _

Why was it that no one ever cared for her? What did she do? Surely it wasn't her fault that her poor brother never made it out of Mommy's tummy… or maybe it was. That didn't matter though! She was determined to make her Mommy like her!

Pretty, pretty please Don't you ever, ever feel Like your less than Fuckin' perfect Pretty, pretty please If you ever, ever feel Like your nothing You're fuckin' perfect to me

This voice was calling to her. Telling her she was perfect. Oh how she loved and adored this voice. It spoke to her in her times of distress all throughout her child hood. It was just a loving soothing whisper but it helped. When she would hear this she wouldn't think she was so alone. She felt like someone somewhere actually cared for her. Many times she would try to use her Jagan eye to locate the person this whisper belonged to, but she never had any luck.

You're so mean When you talk About yourself You are wrong Change the voices In your head  
>Make them like you Instead So complicated Look happy you'll make it Filled with so much hatred Such a tired game It's enough I've done all I can think of Chased down all my demons<br>See you do the same 

Yukena came home from school one day only to find her mother's boyfriend passed out on the couch. _"Great! Just what I need! Mom's at work and this fucking loser is passed out drunk on my sofa!" _Yukena tried to go quietly around him as to avoid waking him up. She had just got to the door of her room when she felt breathing on the back of her neck. She sighed.

"You think you could sneak passed me, girl?" he asked. When she didn't answer, he pulled her arm to twist her around. "Look at me when I talk to you, skank." When she was facing him he backed her into her shut door putting both hands next to her head, successfully blocking her in.

"Now we're going to go into your bedroom and have some…. Fun before your mom gets home, you understand?"

"No! I wont let you this time! I've had eno-" SMACK! He silenced her with a punch to the face. He hit her so hard she could already feel the bruise forming itself upon her face.

"I don't want to hear another word out of you is that understood?" With a nod of her head he proceeded to take her into her room and have his way with her, the whole time silent tears fell down her cheeks.

Later that night she found herself cutting like she always did. To take away the pain, to just watch the crimson stain her arm. It was really an amusing thing to watch sometimes. Sometimes, she would just sit there and stare at the red lines making trails along her wrist wondering just how much she was losing, and how much more she could lose before it all ended…

The next day at school, she put her mask on and acted as nothing happened. Even though there was no one who cared about her, there was no need to let everything that happened to her be available for all to see. She would not let them know about the rapes, she would never let them know that she was her mom 's drug and alcohol test subject, she would never let them know about the cutting, she would never let them know that she was leaving…

Pretty, pretty please Don't you ever, ever feel Like your less than Fuckin' perfect Pretty, pretty please If you ever, ever feel Like your nothing You're fuckin' perfect to me

It was weeks after Yukena had left her house in the floating city. She had managed to make her way to Hanging Neck Island, where the Dark Tournament was to be held. She didn't know why she needed to go here, but this is where her Jagan eye showed her she must go. Now Yukena finds herself wandering the forest alone, feeling like shit. Here she was at 18 years old and had nothing, no loving family, no boyfriend, not even a single friend. She sat down and leaned against a tree trunk. She closed her eyes as she sighed and fingered her knife she keeps with her. It would take away the pain. She rolled up her sleeve, took out the knife, and place it against her arm. Suddenly she felt a strange yet very familiar presence coming closer.

She glanced up to see a short boy dressed in black robes with black hair standing a foot away, staring at her. She took her time to take his appearance in. _"Something about him seems so familiar"_ she thought. And that's when she noticed he had a piece of white cloth tied around his head like a bandana. She recognized this tactic easily, as it was one she and her kind used often to blend in with the humans better.

"You have a Jagan." She simply stated.

"Yes and I take it you as well." He responded shortly. To which she merely nodded in assent. "Who are you? And why do you insist on hurting yourself?" he asked as though he really didn't want to know the answer but was curious all the same.

"My name is Yukena, and I do this because it helps ease the pain." At the mention of her name his eyes shot open wide. "What?" She asked noticing his reaction.

"You said your name was Yukena?" Again she nodded. "My Jagan has been sending me the voice of a young girl named Yukena. She never felt good enough for anyone. There would be times I could feel her pain and anxiety. I would always try to tell her she was…."

"Perfect" they both said at the same time.

"You're the one!" She gasped, "The one who would always try to get me to see positive and not dwell on the bad."

"Yes that was me. My name is Hiei."

The world's scared while I swallow the fear The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer So cool in lying and I tried tried But we try too hard, it's a waste of my time Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere They don't like my jeans, they don't get my hair Estrange ourselves and we do it all the time Why do we do that? Why do I do that? Why do I do that?

Hiei and Yukena have been married for 4 years now. They just celebrated their daughter's second birthday today. Thanks to Hiei, Yukena never cuts anymore, and she feels loved and adored by him. She has Keiko, Botan, and Shoizuru, the three best friends anyone could ever ask for. Kurama and she have gotten close as well. He's the loving caring brother that she never had growing up.

As she laid her daughter down for bed she whispered the same phrase she always did. It was a goodnight ritual for them

"pretty pretty pretty, Pretty pretty please don't you ever ever feel Like you're less then, less than perfect Pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel Like you're nothing you are perfect, to me You're perfect You're perfect Pretty, pretty please don't you ever ever feel like you're less then, less than perfect Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel like you're nothing you are perfect to me"

"Good night mommy"

Good night Isabella, Mommy loves you so much"


End file.
